Looking Back at Childhood Plans

I’ve been thinking about this dream thing again, and I’ve realized that while I have a lot of my dreams written down in journals and notebooks, it’s going to be a while before I can get them typed up. So in the meantime, this is going to serve as my place to vent my frustrations on things and situations in my life as well as celebrate the good things happening as well.

 Because I have a hard time, a lot of the time, trying to come up with something to talk about on here, I Googled blog ideas and I made a list of 32 ideas that seem like a good idea to try and write about. I’m going to set a goal for myself, to write about one of those things on that list every day until it is done. I’m sure I’ll have other things to say between those particular posts, but that list is just serving as a list of ideas.

 With the above being said, I suppose I should put one of those ideas to good use. I like this one ‘Childhood Plans, What I Wanted to be When I Grew Up’ because everyone- no matter who you are, always dreamed about what they wanted to do as an adult. Now that I am an adult, I’m still dreaming about what I want to be when I grow up. Mostly because I still don’t know what I want to do for a career. My current job is just a job, but I could see myself doing it for quite a few years.

 When I was little, I always wanted to be a princess, but once I realized that I had to be of royal blood or lucky enough to bag myself a prince, there was no way I could be a princess. Then my focus shifted to being a teacher. I remember having friends over after school, or going to their house and we would play ‘School’ where I would always want to be the teacher. Quite similar to playing ‘House’ I had to be the mom or the cool older sister or the baby. The part about playing school was being the teacher and having that special red hard cover notebook that held the attendance and grades of each student in the class. I always thought I could be the most powerful person in the world if I had one of those.

 As I started growing up, aside from being a teacher, my interests shifted from time to time to be a meteorologist, an artist, a musician, a professional writer, an interior decorator, a historian and a professional cake baker. But for some reason out of all of those things, the only ones that stuck were teacher, historian and cake baker. Then I decided that I would become a history teacher. I had it all planned out in my head, go to UW-Whitewater for a degree to become a history teacher, find a job at a local school and teach for the rest of my life. My junior year in high school, my parents and I drove down to Whitewater to tour the campus and meet the head of the history department. The campus is beautiful, and not the first time I had been there. A few years before I went to tour, my brother graduated from UW-Whitewater so I think part of me wanting to go to that university was because my brother went there. Even though there is a rather large gap in years between us, I still wanted to be just like him and do everything he did. I even took French in school instead of Spanish or German (though in hindsight I should have taken Spanish) so that my brother could help me with my homework if I didn’t understand it. I remember being so excited to take French in school that I told my brother and he said the only thing that he remembers (I’m guessing he was kidding now that I look back because I know he knows more than he said he did at the time) was to ask for the bathroom “Où est la salle de bains?” which actually is “where is the shower” but that didn’t stop me from wanting to learn more.

 Anyway, my parents and I went down to tour the campus at Whitewater. After meeting the head of this history department at the university we walked away with an odd feeling, like the guy didn’t really know much about his area. We asked what it would take and what sorts of classes were needed to become a history teacher and he just didn’t have much information on it and said that wasn’t something he was familiar with. Rather strange for the head of the department, don’t you think? So after meeting the unknowledgeable gentleman, we finished the tour of the campus, and went to the, I guess you could call it the gift shop and then went home. At first I was rather discouraged about becoming a history teacher, but that didn’t stop me from looking at other universities in the state of Wisconsin. I also looked at UW-Superior, but I decided that being that far away from family for four years would be too hard for me so I abandoned that idea.

 During all of this, I discovered something about myself that I love to bake and decorate cakes. Granted I already knew that I loved to bake cookies, cakes and cupcakes so going to school for that would be a great alternative for my initial plan of becoming a history teacher was put on the back burner.

 So even though I still haven’t gone to college for anything that I want to do, I still would like to someday go to college for either of those things. But after my experience of going to a local technical college, I’ve shied away from school. I wouldn’t say it was bad, but I will say I was definitely not ready for something like that and was massively glad that I wasn’t at a large campus like Whitewater or Superior. I have some major anxiety problems that I’m working on and at the time, my heart wasn’t in to going to college. I wanted to do the baking and pastry arts program at the technical school, but the program was full when I finally decided I wanted to do it. So instead, I ended up taking a bunch of classes to make sure I had enough credits to continue to stay on my parents’ health insurance. There was already a lot of tension between my mom and me so much so that I moved out of the house a week after I turned 18 some months before graduating high school (but that’s a whole post on its own). I felt like I was being forced to go to college just so I could continue the health insurance. In the end, I stopped going to the classes and got as much of a refund as I could on the classes and the unused books.

 Regardless, of what happed to dissuade me from going to college I think that someday I’ll go. Probably not to be a history teacher- mostly because I wanted to specialize in war history and that would be a hard job to find in my area. No, I think I’ll go for that baking and pastry arts program and if not that, perhaps I’ll go for a business management program so I can climb the corporate ladder if an opportunity came along to do so. I’m always going to love history and baking, so if I end up doing the business management and take some additional classes in the history area and then down the line a bit later in my life, I’ll finally take that baking and pastry arts program for something to do in my eventual retirement when I’m old.